Shedding your outer skin when networking

If there is one thing I have noticed over the years networking online and in meetings and is that not everyone is their true selves.

It is as if before immersing theirselves in networking thay have donned a suit of armour and selected an array of weapons to help win the networking battle.

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People new (and some not so new) to networking project themselves as they wish others to see them, they hide traits they consider to be harmful to their image, their emotions are held in check and they are all prepared with their business cards, their elevator pitch and their benefits list.

They speak and write as if everything has to be done in a rush.

They do the rounds of networking meetings handing out cards, shaking hands, toasting everyones good health. They write blogs on their specialist subjects, of which there are generally two .. themselves and their business.

Not to put too fne a point on it, they are robots, friendly ones who do not really engage. This may be through fear or someone has not told them how it really works.

It is all to easy to feel you have put your heart and soul into networking and had no business in return .. zip, zilch, nada. Hundreds or thousands of hours, Hundreds or thousands of dollars down the pan.

This networking lark is just a myth, ships pass in the night and nothing happens.

Or is it?

Truth is networking is as real as you make it , the ability to make it work for you is in your hands and your approach.

You just have to shed your outer protective skin , be prepared to be yourself and let people into your real world.

Now I am not suggesting you wear your heart on your sleeve and pour you innermost feelings out to everyone you connect with, that would be counter productive.

Build a circle of contacts by joining networking sites, blogging and promoting your blogs, finding those who share common interest via searching.

Then gradually take part in discussions, listen more than you talk. Meet people over a drink, lunch or dinner, get to know who they really are.

Spend time engaging , rather than a scatter gun approach, let your message filter out through the circle you have created.

Be prepared to lend support when you can on a personal or project level, let others know your strengths but do not be afraid to let them know the real you.

Above all, be yourself and make friends and shed that outer skin.

Then when you reach out to your circle of friends, you will be reaching out to their circles too.

If you are prepared to go the extra mile and reach out, then over time, networking is one of the most effective, enjoyable ways of making a living.

Steven